I really enjoyed this. Thank you. I’ve never been a hostage negotiator, but I have worked a LOT in customer service, and much of this sounds familiar. The moment you acknowledge the other person’s point of view, you defuse things to a great degree.
Thank you BayPoodle! Customer service--now that's an important one where curiosity about an angry person can be helpful... but, of course, not always. Definitely not a profession for the feint of heart, my hat is off to you.
Not only is this piece reminding me that I need to reread Never Split the Difference—I was surprised by how useful it was!—it's a reminder to reread your newsletter about the link between curiosity and connection, too. (The Barbara Walters story was totally fascinating!)
Oh, you've read Split the Difference?! I agree--it was surprisingly useful! And yes, how Barbara Walters gets people to open up in these nontraditional ways is so interesting. I'm currently in a deep dive into how Howard Stern does it. There really are a lot of ways to connect, that's for sure.
I read it in an act of extreme overpreparation for a salary negotiation 😅 Looking forward to reading your Howard Stern takeaways, if you share them here!
I really enjoyed this. Thank you. I’ve never been a hostage negotiator, but I have worked a LOT in customer service, and much of this sounds familiar. The moment you acknowledge the other person’s point of view, you defuse things to a great degree.
Thank you BayPoodle! Customer service--now that's an important one where curiosity about an angry person can be helpful... but, of course, not always. Definitely not a profession for the feint of heart, my hat is off to you.
I'm not surprised that there's so much overlap between hostage negotiation and customer service! 🙈
Not only is this piece reminding me that I need to reread Never Split the Difference—I was surprised by how useful it was!—it's a reminder to reread your newsletter about the link between curiosity and connection, too. (The Barbara Walters story was totally fascinating!)
Oh, you've read Split the Difference?! I agree--it was surprisingly useful! And yes, how Barbara Walters gets people to open up in these nontraditional ways is so interesting. I'm currently in a deep dive into how Howard Stern does it. There really are a lot of ways to connect, that's for sure.
I read it in an act of extreme overpreparation for a salary negotiation 😅 Looking forward to reading your Howard Stern takeaways, if you share them here!
Exactly, and as in any relationship, it is about building rapport first. Love it.
Yes!!